Good morning, accompany you to read.
do you ever feel that everything is not going well for a moment?
I am obviously trying to be self-disciplined, but the people around me always go behind your will, from close friends to passers-by who seem to be deliberately looking for unhappiness.
when you say it, you don't understand, you can't argue, you can't figure it out, it's time for you to figure it out: the greatest self-discipline of adults is to restrain themselves and correct others.
you can never correct anyone
recently a netizen complained that his friends around him had been fooled countless times and didn't listen to advice.
once a friend asked for insurance, but she didn't look like a bargain. She tried so hard to bring her back, but the friend was angry with her: "you don't understand, why don't you let me buy it?"
A year later, her friend knew she regretted it and asked her how to refund the insurance premium.
another friend was tricked into attending the training. she advised her friend to study by herself first to see if it was suitable. as a result, her friend signed up for class with warm blood and was badly cheated.
she thought that when these friends understood, they would thank her, but the reality is that her relationship with everyone is not only getting worse and worse, but also lost the title of "crow mouth".
everyone thinks differently, and it's not so easy to be grateful for what you think of as kindness.
as Schopenhauer said: "it is easy to hurt others, but it is difficult to improve them, even if there is no hindrance."
someone once did an experiment, which took the whole afternoon and evening to persuade a person.
he looked everywhere for information to make sure that every sentence he said was justified, but the other side always clung to one or two inappropriate words.
it was clear that he was trying to help others, but finally the other person said strangely, "Yes, you are the best."
when you think others are funny, they may not hear what you say.
maybe that person is close to you, but he has his own idea. Maybe everything you say is reasonable, but the decision is not yours in the first place.
entangled with its boredom, constantly consume themselves, and keep silent in time is the real self-discipline.
that's because you don't have enough self-cultivation.
I've heard such a saying: "if you don't like others, you don't have enough self-cultivation."
in the past, when we saw people who were not pleasing to our eyes and things that were not pleasing to us, we all thought it was someone else's problem. When we gradually matured, we would find that we were indeed more responsible.
there is a help post on the Internet, saying that I don't know when to start, and everyone is upset.
the roommate's screen name bears the word "Gao Leng". He is very uncomfortable with it and feels that others are too narcissistic, so he has to face the past: "what are you pretending to be?"
Dad likes to talk when watching TV, and he can't stand pointing at the program: "you can talk so much, you'd better go up and host the show."
my younger brother likes to watch Japanese anime and occasionally comes out with a few words in Japanese, which he thinks is showing off.
from a bystander's point of view, these things can't be small, or even the other person hasn't done anything wrong.
isn't it the same thing that we take great pains to correct?
Compliment your decent grace in our gowns rehersal dinner for bride. We have the perfect selections to cater for all tastes.
when I see someone kicking chairs in the cinema, I don't feel angry. I chirp when I watch my friends eat. I also feel that the other person is ill-bred, and the more I think about it, the more uncomfortable I feel.
but we have all seen some people who have room for people in their eyes, do not often pretend things in their hearts, and give people the feeling of the spring breeze wherever they go.
I have to admit that these people have a larger pattern and a higher level of self-cultivation.
when we are no longer obsessed with other people's every move, our hearts are naturally at ease, with more help and less hindrance in words and things.
with the passage of time, we will gradually alienate from some people, but there is no need to have waves in our hearts, no matter good or bad, we can laugh it off.
everyone has the right to live the way they like
you must have had the pain of being controlled, right?
if you want to buy a dress, your friend insists that your vision is out of date; in the morning, you are so sleepy that you are woken up by your mother; just about to change your job, there are seven or eight opinions in your ear.
an author of the brief book wrote that she was extremely disgusted with the careers of nurses and kindergarten teachers.
she actually respects those people in her post, and the industry itself is a popular preference, but she clearly remembers that her parents forced two choices on her during the high school entrance examination: a nurse and a kindergarten teacher.
No one likes to live a set life, whether it's a straight road or a detour, we all have the right to take the path of our own choice, and so do others, who can't live as we like.
not to mention many things, it is arsenic in An and honey in B.
when you want to influence others, how do you know that others are unhappy?
the former "stingy God" Wang Shenai went on a hot search because of buying a house.
she graduated nine years ago, saving money to the extreme. Relying on the money saved by herself and her husband, she has taken out a loan to buy two apartments.
all these years, she never goes to classmate reunions and is afraid of spending money.
her clothes, except underwear, are not wanted by her friends, and her money for clothes is no more than 100 yuan a year.
she won't let go of the points, gifts and one cent of each online shopping platform.
some people praised her on the Internet, and some even scolded her: "what's the point of living like this?"
words such as miser and mental illness often appear on the barrage.
her state is by no means perfect, but she enjoyed it and explained that she did not advocate that everyone should not spend money and respect everyone's.The concept of consumption.
it is enough to live with your attitude and comfort.
there are all kinds of people in the world, and there are so many different viewpoints that we don't have to agree with anyone, let alone force them to identify with each other. As long as we do a good job of ourselves, life will be good.
can't influence others
treat yourself attentively
stare at other people's lives every day, the dissatisfaction in your heart will inevitably accumulate more and more.
you don't like other people's actions and worry about their life choices, but no matter who they are, you can't live for them.
if you figure it out, it's time for you to go uphill.
there is a friend in her hometown who used to work in the system, and the people next to her only worked from nine to five, hoping for the child to be better at best.
she began to feel that others were not motivated, so she recommended books to her colleagues and pulled them together to attend the lecture.
my colleagues not only don't like it, but also talk about her behind her back: "this is to think too much, and when she knows it's difficult, she's still messing around."
later, she said no more, but every day on the subway, she took out her cell phone to watch courses, and when she got home from work, she would read professional books again.
when she is free on weekends, she will go to listen to the lectures of all kinds of big names.
now this friend has gone to Guangdong, changed careers based on the knowledge he learned before, started advertising, and earned twice as much money as before.
some of her colleagues at that time were still in touch with her, but how they chose each other was no longer so important, and those who disliked her "tossing about" also changed to "envy."
We should have known that respect for others is always easier than control.
it's just you, a look worthy of your attention.
you are the only one who deserves your obsessive-compulsive persistence.
take your eyes back from others. When you start to focus on yourself, you will find that you will change not only yourself, but also what others think of you and the attitude of the world towards you.